Posted by Gus on 29/9/2011, 6:32 pm, in reply to "My Plight....."

Hello there, I am 46 now and have had 'Shy Bladder Syndrome' (SBS)for at least... god 30 years - it's only recently I decided to do the Workshop (which I haven't done yet). I read the de-sensing stuff here ages ago and have practised this - I worked as a courier for a couple of years and that definitely improved my ability to use service station toilets! I'd still find this difficult in some situations though. e.g. arriving when a busy coach party follows you in to the gents, or if travelling with a group of friends. Where I work currently there are lots of toilets and I practice using one of the two 'bowl' urinals daily. When I'm involved at meetings though sometimes I just sip water instead of gulping down tea as I know my heightened 'performance anxiety' may make it hard to go even if I can get out. In my youth I always thought of myself as 'different' and for a very long time thought I was alone with this problem. Fortunately though I've always had friends who have let me take my time as it were. When I used to go out drinking always found some pubs easier than others. Sometimes when it was busy I'd go out of the door off down a lane and find a bush rather than brave the toilets after an 'unsuccessful' visit earlier. Have often wondered on the cause of this in myself and since finding the website and seeing how many other sufferers there are out there I have concluded it is actually quite normal physiologically. When you look at the way cats behave in the company of other strange cats, it's not hard to understand why human beings also suffer some kind of physiological response when thrown into close quarters with others. If anything I believe for a lot of people learning to use a urinal in the company of others is a product of quite a complex conditioning process that 'normal' people take for granted. In some other cultures they don't even have urinals. I even heard if you are a guest at someone's house in Sweden it's considered rude at a social occasion for a male NOT to sit down to pee after 10pm... Don't worry about it overly and be kind to yourself.

267