Posted by kev on 2/2/2009, 8:30 pm

well dont know where to start really. im 18 from scotland and cant remember where my paruresis started. all i can remember is i always used to use the cubicals and never failed to pee untill one day (id say i was about 13ish) i thot i should just use the urinals instead but wasnt able to. but then as i kept failing i started to struggle in the cubicals in quiet toilets when people were around. also in my own toilet if someone was behind the door or close. another thing was in highschool i think i only used the toilets about 5 times the whole time i was there i only drank one bottle of juice a day and never neaded untill i got home so never thought much of it. anyway things went on and i didnt let it bother me too much and if i needed the toilet when i was out i would use the urinal if the toilet was empty or the cubical if it was not like most people with ap i suppose. ive went through periods when i couldnt use the urinal if there was any possibilty of someone walking in but i still tried none the less. recently ive found(this might sound stupid) that if im at a urinal and got my belt undone and so on before anyone is in i can pee easy enough because i know i can just pretend im finished if someone walks in. anyway ive only recently told my mum which took a lot of courage but i dont think she understands how big a problem it is she says it doesnt matter if u use cubicals. dont get me wrong tho she listens and is supportive. i recently turned 18 aswell and have quite a large group of friends and i go clubbing and so on with them. ive never turned down a night out because of paruresis. i find like most people when ive had a drink i find it much easier to pee and i never really fail in a cubical as theres always a lot of noise and so on in clubs anyway. ive also been successfull in troughs with people around when ive been out. anyway to cut a long story short although i guess i have quite a mild case of ap i would love to get rid of it altogether if that is possible. its not really practical for me to come to a workshop as ive never heard of one in scotland and wouldnt be too fond of travelling a long distance to go to one.i would like to hear advice from other sufferers though id really appreciate that. thanks kev.

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