Hey all, I have previously been to the online UKPT workshop and found it really useful.

I'm continuing graduated exposure therapy for using urinals but I've found it quite difficult to do a heirarchy as the situation can be so different each time you enter a public loo. For me I can use a urinal sometimes if nobody else is present but can sometime 'lock up' from the fear of somebody entering or generally find it difficult when another urinal is occupied.

Has anyone got any tips for exposure sessions in this situation? I have found that I can be jumping from very low to very high on my heirarchy in the same trip and that can make it hard to see clear progress or move up a hierarchy in a staged way.

Thanks

Hi M
From what you say I think you are jumping ahead of yourself in trying to pee at urinals. I suggest you concentrate on getting comfortable peeing standing in a cubicle, with others in the facility. Start with the door closed and locked; then progress to unlocked, then letting the door stay open. When you can do that reliably when there are others in the toilet, it is a smaller step to move to a urinal. Even then make that step one of faking until the novelty wears off and only then introduce peeing.
So you see it is a series of smaller steps, and you needto accept that it will take as long as it takes; however the result will be more reliable.
How does that sound?
Andrew

Hey there M!
Good to read your post!
I’m glad you found the online workshop really useful.
Pre-workshop 7 years ago, I had lock up for fear of someone entering but since the workshop I began using the urinals every week at all of the conveniences in my town to practice the methods we were taught in the workshop to help overcome such fears and instead of being anxious when someone came in I reversely preferred it if they did come in because if I was alone then I wouldn’t be getting used to using urinals with other men around me. By using different conveniences in my town it got me used to using different layouts and different conveniences of the town can be busier than others at different times/days. For example. The toilets by the market would be busier on market days. The toilets at the bus station could be busier if it’s being used by men before their bus is due in or if they’ve just got off a bus after a journey.
I wonder if your level of urgency is high enough when you’re trying to use urinals now? Maybe try drinking more to increase the urge & remember to rate the urge on a scale of 1-10 with the aim that the higher your level, the more likely you are to be able to successfully urinate.
Andrew has given you great advice so practice on a regular basis.