Posted by Andrew on 28/8/2013, 1:37 pm, in reply to "Distraught"

Hi Tonio 1. First no apology needed for a “long” post. It was not a long one, and anyway a post is as long as it needs to be. :-) 2. It would help to know the extent of your shy bladder. Could you say if you can go in the following situations, and add comments if it depends on certain conditions? Yes No Comments plus conditions for Y/N 1. At home alone 2. At home with visitors 3. At a friend’s or relation’s house 4. Public toilet cubicle with solid wall and door 5. Public toilet cubicle with gaps in walls and doors 6. Train 7. Plane For men only: in the following comment on types of people, separation etc 8. Urinals with dividers in spacious toilet 9. Urinals without dividers in spacious toilet 10. Urinals (2 or 3) with dividers in small toilet 11. Urinals (2 or 3) without dividers in small toilet 12. other 3. Next you say your son is showing signs of having a shy bladder, Could you tell me what makes you say that i.e. what have you observed? NB not what you have made of what you saw or heard. 4. To answer your questions. Yes desensing will work. The “damage” is only that the muscle has got stretched over time and so is not able to squeeze as strongly as it once could. This means the urine is more likely to drain out rather than squirt out. Don’t forget that with age this tends to happen anyway. Desensing has a twofold aim: the first is to get you accustomed to peeing when others are around, but the second is to get you used to standing there waiting for it to happen, without getting anxious about it. 5. You can desense without coming to a workshop. Many have. The best bet is to read our website (the link is above) and/or get hold of the book on the book page. 6. Intervention: can we leave this till you have answered question 3 above? 7. You say you cant get away to attend a workshop. Could you let us know what prevents you? We may be able to help. I look forward to hearing from you soon, so we can move forward with this. Andrew

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