Posted by Andrew on 10/8/2008, 7:57 pm, in reply to "Fed up of this problem, really really need some help!!!"

Hi Adam You ARE going through the mill Adam. It seems you have got into the classic vicious circle: i.e. avoiding a situation; that results in lack of practice in that situation, so it gradully becomes a bit more difficult at the next level down until you have to start avoiding that lower level; and so it goes on down. You then start expecting difficulty instead of success; which makes it more likely that you will find it difficult. It is very hard to break out of that mindset on your own. I am sorry and surprised that you are not finding CBT helpful. Most CBT therapists have not come aross paruresis before; some cannot understand it, and so may not find it easy to apply the cognitive and behavioural aspects. You are welcome to email me what the therapist is doing with you; it could be that it needs explaining to you? You could take some of the info off our linked website along with you. The page called "CBT and practical advice" is the most relevant. Some therapists have got in touch with us to ask about the condition; if you think it may be useful you could suggest that. As for workshops: we keep on running them only because the feedback is so positive; some of the feedback is scattered throughout this forum. Read it and see what you think. Again, email me and I will send you details of the next two Beginners' Workshops in October. Keep in touch, keep posting, and lets work together to get you moving in the right direction. cheers Andrew Chairman

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