This Discussion Board is for men who
find it difficult or impossible to urinate in a public or social situation. Women should use the women's Board.
The Board is maintained and moderated by the
U.K. Paruresis Trust. Registered Charity no: 1109541.
For
further information, visit our website, or contact us at
I can honestly say I had no idea other people suffered from this. I've read a few of the topics on here and was quite surprised just how similar your thoughts are too mine.
I'm not sure exactly when it started for me but it must have been when I was about 7, I'm now 18, and I think it's been getting progressively worse. In primary school, I could go in a cubicle, now I try to make sure noone is in the room (finish school very soon, starting uni in September). I tend to make sure I go when I know it will be quiet e.g. make use of free periods. One reason for it getting worse I think has something to do with the horrors in my school, who create so much of a riot making it impossible for me to "concentrate".
I've always had quite a weak bladder, I make far more visits each day than any of my family (and, to add insult to injury, my brother only goes like three times a day and never needs to go during school hours!) Just now, I've been going to the doctors to find out about why its so weak, e.g. infection, diabetes etc. I haven't told anyone about paruresis and I'm not sure if they'd understand, but its a relief just to talk on here even...
Hi Tom, glad you found this site - its such a relief to know you're not the only one and you've got a recognised condition isn't it ? - have a read of the website and other posts and you'l see that there are ways of tackling it and curing yourself, I'd recommend a workshop also - but you don't wait have to wait for that to start. Also, you might find that you don't have to go as often as you think you do - its normal for people with this condition to go much more often than required, and in turn that makes it worse because its actually easier to get started if you've got a full bladder.
Hi Tom As Mike W says, the problem gets worse due to the way we AP's cope with it - i.e. trying to empty more often than we really need to. You are lucky in that unlike the majority of APs in the country, you have found the UKPT website. Take the time to read all the good stuff there is here, and keep posting your thoughts on the discussion board. Ask Andrew to send you a pamphlet which you can show to your doctor. He may already know about the condition, but it won't hurt to back it up. Don't be shy of telling your Doctor. He needs to run tests to determine if you have a physical problem underlying this. Once you know there is no serious medical condition, do consider enrolling on a workshop. See the references to workshops on the discussion board from people who have been on them before. It could really help But the best thing is you now know you are amongst friends. Friends who will help you overcome this nasty condition and let you get on with your life. Colin
good luck with the doctor - they don't always know about this condition so don't stress if they look a bit blank. going more often is a probl;em for us buty wise to get any physical cause excluded too
Just a little update - I finally told my doctor and to my surprise he was very understanding. He fully appreciated how hard the condition is to live with (has seen people in the past with it)and knows me well anyway (having helped me accept my vitiligo, which has bothered me now for nearly three years).
Anyway, I've been refered to a nurse at my nearest hospital and have an appointment next wednesday. Apparently shes dealt with paruresis in the past, so fingers crossed!
I also had a trip to New York and Washington just a week ago which had been botherering me for months (when I should have been excited like the other students). The trip went well, it might have been because I was able to take my mind off the condition but I managed to enjoy my trip (and the long hours travelling!) without paruresis interfering. American public restrooms seemed to be much better designed (well the ones I used anyway!)
