Posted by Carl on 27/2/2013, 12:32 pm, in reply to "Feedback on the February London Beginners workshop"

It’s a cliché, but what the hell; this weekend workshop has undoubtedly changed my life. I won’t pretend I didn’t have my anxieties over the weekend, but what helped me overcome them and persevere was the knowledgeable and sensitive support of our ‘trainers’ and the understanding displayed by everyone else there. Let’s face it, while AP is a terribly debilitating condition it’s also difficult not to also have a sense of humour about it, and over the course the of the weekend initial nervous laughter turned quickly into relaxed good humour. I’ve had AP for over thirty years, and for more than fifteen years of that time I didn’t know if maybe I was the only person in the whole world who was blocked in this way. Just being able to meet with, work with and socialise with a bunch of ordinary people who understood completely what I was feeling was a revelation and an enormous weight off my mind. They were all also very good company: thankfully we didn’t spend two days doing nothing but anx about our AP! We also ate and drank and talked about all sorts of stuff. Three days later I’m still feeling quite elated : I know that won’t last long, but I learnt some stuff about positive thinking which I think will stay with me for a very long time. The techniques we were introduced to – practised in a safe and trusting environment – not only worked, but I could see how they worked and plan how I could introduce them into my own life. It wasn’t all plain-sailing, of course, and there were times when, alone in my comfy bed at night, I kicked myself for my failures; but the realisation that addressing AP is a long process and that there will be periods of failure as well as success was reinforced continually during workshop presentations. On the other hand I did manage, during the de-sensing exercises, to accomplish stuff I never thought I would be able to again. Not only was I able to pee in front of my buddies in the safe environment of the hotel, I was also able to walk into a public urinal and perform, too. (OK, just the once, but hey, I haven’t been able to do that since I was a kid!) If you’re nervous about attending a workshop nothing I say here is really going to make you not nervous; but I would urge anyone to give it a try. As someone said over the weekend, “what’s the worst that can happen - it won’t kill me”.

239