Posted by J on 25/1/2012, 10:33 pm, in reply to "Re: Time to try de-sensing I think"

I thought i'd update abit on my progress. I started using the urinals in the public loos pretty much every day through december. I've locked up on a few occasions though, probably 1 in every 5 tries, and I can usually figure out what caused it and reflect on how to improve. Often, it's either not fluid loading enough so the urge isn't strong enough to overcome any anxiety, or hesitating and overthinking things, which kind of throws me off. That said, I was definately getting alot better by the end of Dec. I didn't practice much in the hols, was lazy really. At the start of Jan i locked up a few times and it knocked my confidence abit, but I quickly got back into the routine of going at the very least once at the urinals a day, often more, and over the past week i've attempted to increase the difficulty a little when possible (it'd look wierd standing closer to other urinal users in an otherwise empty toilet, so i have to pick my moments ). One great thing is i'm finding I can use the urinals in the pokey work loos with the right conditions, which feels like quite a big improvement already! It's good though even when i'm in a particularly easy situation, cos it all feels like a step in the right direction. Going to continue practicing and trying to up the difficulty when I can. I still have a long way to go, and have yet to be in a particularly high pressure setting like with a queue or stading next to someone or anything like that. Will update again in a couple of months i think, as long as nothing major goes wrong in the mean time. I think posting here is kind of theraputic, by writing things down it feels like i'm taking control and dealing with this phobia.

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