Posted by Andrew on 30/5/2008, 5:59 pm, in reply to "Opening up (or trying to)"

Hi Mike I agree with Andy. Though your psy caould argue that there is nothing wrong, because you are not psychotic, schyzophrenic, bi-polar, clinically depressed etc etc, the fact that your anxiety has got out of control to the point that it is illogical, and has distorted your perception of the real world, is a problem. Psychologists who treat this condition recognise that CBT is the therapy required: i.e. to understand your perceptions and to show you how they are wrong and help you to see that, and to help you change your behaviour, in this case mainly by graduated exposure. You can do this on your own, but it can be a lot easier if you get started with help. As for telling others: do it on a basis of (a) they need to know and (b) I trust them. A script is on the website. You will find that reactions fall into two categories 1. guys to whom peeing has always been successful: they will struggle to understand what the problem is, will see it as no big deal, and will quickly forget you told them. 2. guys who have locked up on occasions, but have no problem with it: once you say it happens all the time for you, they will understand the difficulties it causes. They will say they just go in a cubicle or leave and return a bit later. A good proportion will mention someone they know who is affected to some degree. Instead of seeing yourself negatively as someone who cannot pee, can you see yourself positively as a guy who likes his privacy and his personal space? cheers Andrew

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