This Discussion Board is for men who
find it difficult or impossible to urinate in a public or social situation. Women should use the women's Board.
The Board is maintained and moderated by the
U.K. Paruresis Trust. Registered Charity no: 1109541.
For
further information, visit our website, or contact us at
re-reading the post about my fund rasing efforts at work, it reminded me I havent posted about my own experiences recently. For me I have had a lot of stresses both in and out of work and my paruresis hasn't got any better in fact it's probably worse since last posting. I am not sure but I am wondering if some of my blood pressure/cholestrol medications i now have to take have had an affect on my testosterone/estrogen balance. I've begun to notice that peeing has become more troublesome even in private situations where I used to be fine - it's sort of like my penis feels like its shrivelling up into nothing??? if that makes any sense? Sitting to pee has become awkward because I seem to get inappropriate erections and end up peeing over the rim under the seat if I am not paying attention and directing my flow or standing when in shrivelled state, i end up peeing down my trouser legs. It's becoming really frustrating and a nuisscance particularly when at work. I try to use the disabled facilities where I can get away with it but feel the wrath of colleagues if seen using the facilities because I don't look like i'm disabled and shouldn't be using them. I've seen something on the internet today and need members advice on whether what I have seen might be a possible workaround. Tell me what you think. The web pages I looked at came about after seeing some you tube videos In the sidebar video lists that caught my attention - they were postings about trans gender males using stand to pee devices. One particular device was being reviewed the peecock gen 2 - basically it's a silicone shape flacid hollow penis with a funnel shaped to look like testicles that enables trans men to pee standing. The makes claim it should pass as normal on inadvertant viewing at urinals. What caught my interest was it's design in terms of could the funnel end shape sit over my penis when it is in its shrunken state and enable me to dribble my pee through it out through the silicone crafted phalus in a more controllable way. And if that worked could I even do it at urinal and not draw attention to myself in the process. The device costs about $170 plus shipping so If this sort of thing might be worth considering as a fallback device I need to be sure its money well spent or am I just following a blind alley on this approach. Advice is needed.
Penile shrinkage is a natural physical response to fear or strong anxiety. It is part of the fight or flight response where blood is shunted from inessential areas (e.g. digestion, skin, genitals) to life saving areas (e.g. muscles of the legs and arms). Hence why you go pale with fear, and yes the penis can shrink to almost nothing.
One guy on a workshop had this badly and was very upset by it. I explained the physiology of the penis (essentialy made up of millions of blood filled balloons which can collapse to almost nothing) and the fight or flight response. As he got less anxious during the workshop, so he reported (in private) that the shrinkage was lessening, until it ceased to happen. One very delighted bunny.
So anxiety is probably the cause in your case. Any chance you can find a way to reduce that?
You sound like you used to get it out and then let go with your hands and think about other things while peeing was going on. Can you change to actively holding it and pointing it so you pee in the right place? Most people have to do that.
Disabled toilets. The public have a misconception about these. They are adapted so they can be used by the disabled, but are not restricted to only the disabled. Anyone can use them. Its not like a disabled parking place. In the unlikely event that someone is queueing waiting for you to exit, well they could have been queueing behind a disabled person.
As for the prosthesis: out of my depth here I'm afraid. Only comments I can make are (a) would using one increase your anxiety rather then reducing it and (b) as this issue is major for you, it may be worth risking the cost: you could assume it wont work but hope it will.
