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Hi everyone! A friend has bought me a hot air balloon experience as a birthday present. She will be disappointed if I don't go but I understand the flight lasts about two hours and there's at least an hours drive to get to the airfield. She doesn't know I'm terrified of finding I desperately need to wee, either before or during the flight. I expect there will be toilets at the airfield but I understand they sometimes launch from green field sites where there are no loos, besides, I know I wouldn't be able to use a loo there, even assuming there is one. What am I to do? I could say I'm scared of heights but feel she deserves to know the real reason, but I can't bring myself to tell her. Help!
hot air balloons are not the safest things to fly in...I would be locked up in one too.... tell the truth...you have trouble peeing...plus the added anxiety of the balloon...... you don't have to do everything that others want for you to do... in this case...you are right....many people would feel uncomfortable regardless ..
Yes, I agree with what Wiiliam says. I SHOULD tell my friend of my anxiety about weeing but I can't bring myself to say the words! Actually, I discovered I can 'swap' my voucher for any one of a number of alternative experiences but so far I haven't seen any that ally my fears.
what other activities are there ?? I think fear of heights is rational.. ie it is justified in many circumstances as there is real risk. like standing at the edge of cliff, edge of roof, 20 ft ladder, being unbuckled in a helicopter.... there is real danger there..not imagined.
Hello Penny Re: telling people. ALL the people I have told about my condition have been sympathetic. They don't laugh, scream or behave oddly at all. They may not understand it, but they realise it affects you, and they are your friends/colleagues so their instinct is to help Many who attend follow-up workshops report that actually friends' lack of response is somehow disappointing after all the worries we have built up about sharing this with them. Give it a go, or better yet-book a workshop so you can practice it with a buddy first. Colin
most of my friends spend 1 second thinking about my shy bladder and forget it the next second...they are too busy with other things in their own life...they ate totally indifferent or not concerned or bothered by it.
As a former longtime aviator, with paruresis, I feel a need to make my viewpoint known.
She is your friend. Then she deserves your trust in her that can enable you to tell her about your condition. The experience of nearly all sufferers that have made this step is that people do not turn their backs on you. She will be more of a friend to you after this confession!
Also, coming back to the original and currently most pressing problem, this experience that you will not be sent to hell right away, will enable you to tackle the balloon flight proposal. Every launching place for a balloon has an owner and one always needs permission to use the terrain or field concerned. The owner or the local farmer that rents the land will know a toilet nearby somewhere! Everywhere where people live and dwellings are present, there are toilets to be found. Ask for the balloon trip organiser or the balloon commander to take care of your need to have a toilet visit shortly before launch. They have passengers all the time and some percentage of these passengers (the women to start with) will often want to have access to some form of urination privacy. Maybe you are already happy that they know in the first place, and they might consider to use the Landrover or other towing vehicle that brings the balloon equipment to the site to whisk you off to the nearest concentration of trees just out of sight.
A balloon flight is a great experience, even without the liberation that your mind is ready for this birthday (‘happy birthday’ will be the lesser experience if you follow my advice). Swap for anything that would suit you better, but do not let the occasion pass without telling your friend.
And if you find the obstacle too high still: book a workshop; Andrew here knows a way to fit you in in a proper way. Let me correct that: the workshop is what you should consider anyway.
You will not regret following up any of the above steps to the better rest of your life.
BTW, for Colin and Andrew: I’m still the same Frank from the Netherlands as in 2007 in two London workshops! Still having the problem partly, but: all the time refusing to let it spoil my life any further!
Hello Frank Thanks for posting I hope Penny will take your advice. Good to hear from you. Are you still driving trains these days? Colin
Re: Hi Frank
Posted by Andy L on 2/10/2013, 10:12 am, in reply to "Hi Frank"
Hi there,
I went from nobody knowing, to having a Skype chat on "embarrassing bodies" with one of the doctors on TV. I have since told my wife and parents. Even my father-in-law now knows! (Turns out he's on the same medication as me for an enlarged prostate).
