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find it difficult or impossible to urinate in a public or social situation. Women should use the women's Board.
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I've had some form of this condition for as long as I can remember and have never, in my adult life, used a urinal. When I was at school I could not use the toilets so had to wait all day until I got home. I have always been put off going to pubs because I knew I wouldn't be able to go and it would get very uncomfortable. I would regularly stand over a toilet for ten minutes or more waiting for something to happen that never did.
However, I can now cope better with the problem by taking some practical measures such as keeping an eye on who's coming in and out of the toilets and picking my best time. Also, I made a deliberate effort to become comfortable in the toilets at work, meaning I can now use them even when other people are there. This would have been impossible a few years ago. The knock on effect has been that I now feel more comfortable about using public toilets generally, although it can still take me a long time and I sometimes need more than one attempt.
I have never told anyone about this, although I think people I know have got used to waiting for me. It's been good to read other people's stories. I've always known in the abstract that I wasn't alone but it is still reassuring to hear such familiar stories from other people.
Thank you for the site. I'm glad I found it.
Re: First time
Posted by Andrew on 16/6/2008, 2:56 pm, in reply to "First time"
Hi Richard
Welcome!
You have got the right idea about taking steps to become more comfortable with the situation at work. We use the term "faking it" which means: when you do not need a pee, you go in and go through the motions. This removes the anxiety due to the need to pee, and gives you the chance to deal with the anxiety of being there, and to get used to the movements and sounds of the place, and just as importantly, to get used to standing there with nothing happening.
When you have repeated this say six times (say once every 5-10 mins), you will be so bored (instead of anxious) that you will feel more able to consider drinking and practicing peeing.
The main thing is to not jump in the deep end, but to start with as easy a place as possible, and only move up a level of challenge when you can pee reliably at the lower level.
There are other things to help, but they are descibed on the website, so I'll stick with this for now.