This Discussion Board is for men who
find it difficult or impossible to urinate in a public or social situation. Women should use the women's Board.
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Just had my third session of NLP therapy in a bid to beat my paruresis but to no avail.
Came out after it and still nothing at the urinal (ok in cubicles). Therapist pretty much accepts that he's failed on this one.
Pretty pissed off and just wonder if anyone has any pointers? Off to a festival in a few weeks and would like to avoid the queues/questions when using the portaloos!
Ant, you don't say how long you have had AP, but I am guessing it was longer than three weeks. It is therefore unlikely you could overcome it with just three sessions of NLP. Perhaps you should persevere. Very few things worth doing can be achieved with a quick fix. And overcoming AP is no exception to this. If NLP really is not working for you, perhaps you could consider a UKPT weekend workshop? There is lots of help and advice on the UKPT website which might help you at the festival. Take some time to read all the helpful advice which is here, and keep posting your progress so everyone here can give some input and help you along. Post to let people know what is working and what you find difficult to put into practice. As you are OK in cubicles, remember you have the right to use one at any time, and for as long as you like. What you do in it is your business and no-one elses. Lots of blokes who don't have AP prefer to use cubicles. There is no law that says a man has to use a urinal if he doesnt want to. A few quick tips on using cubicles to pee. 1. Make a noise - pee straight down the middle "loud n proud", so you are not hiding, you are just peeing (the way YOU want to). 2. Try to work up to leaving the cubicle door open. Again, this way you are not hiding, you are CHOOSING. You can practice this at home or in safe situations over the next few weeks till the festival, possibly tying it in with the techniques your NLP therapist has taught you. The idea is to lock into your memory some successes, so you focus on them whenever you visit a toilet, rather than the times when it was difficult. I am sure there will be other tips people have on using cubicles which they can pass on to you to prepare you for the festival. I hope you have a great time there. Colin
Thanks for that Colin. It's the third NLP session I've had spaced back over about 5 months. Like most I can only guess how long I've been putting up with AP but I'd say around 16 or 17 years really.
Does anyone have any suggestions for any other methods I could try? Pretty much open to anything now as very frustrated with the whole thing.
Workshop-wsie, do you do any in Glasgow/Edinburgh?
Hi Ant Have you tried any of the things I suggested? How have you found it? I am sure other people will come up with good ideas too. If you can get to a workshop, I am sure it will help. Workshops are held in London and Manchester, and are routinely advertised on the discussion board. Colin
Sorry, just remembered Andrew is no longer posting beginners workshops. (see post at the top of the page)- Register your interest by emailing him at the support email address at the top of the page.
Those urinal things that you get at some festivals (The tardis looking things) are not as bad as they look. I can never use urinals if there are people around. But I can use them. They are actually really private and no one can tell if you are peeing or not. That removes the pressure for me and I have no problem there. Failing that I just find a bush. No one at a festival will care. That is guaranteed! If you see a tardis, have a go! You may be pleasantly suprised.
